to know where we are going we need to know where we come from…

I’ m Lis , currently 25 ;

Born to loving and hardworking Hispanic parents in California,

A Daughter of our Heavenly Father;

and Yes I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints … also known as the Mormon Church.

But I wasn’t always a member… this is my story

I was born in California to a part member family; my mom pretty much grew up in the church back in Chiapas , Mexico but wasn’t always very active in it and my dad really wasn’t religious back in Honduras ,  when they had me shortly after coming to the states my dad wasn’t interested in learning about the church and my mom desired to become active again, so about a year after I was born my mom invited the missionaries over to talk to her and my “I don’t want to meet with them ” father ended up taking the lessons and being baptized. However they did both fall away from the church shortly after , but they still believed it was true. As I got older I don’t remember going to church and I don’t remember my parents asking me if I wanted to go; my dad however says that I was adamant about not wanting to go, and that in order to not have to deal with me throwing fits they gave up . I know I always stood out from my friends who would talk about all these prayers and traditions their families did, and they always would ask me ” How do you not know what that is ? Aren’t you catholic?Weren’t you baptized as a baby?” . To these questions I remember my response would be  “No I’m not catholic, my parents are Mormons and they don’t baptize until you are 8, but I didn’t get baptized because my mom got sick so I’m nothing “.

Looking back now I realize that I had faith that things were how they were supposed to be , I didn’t want to say I was Mormon because I didn’t know what that was since my  parents didn’t teach me and since I didn’t know anyone that was an active member of the church , but I also knew that being catholic because I was Hispanic wasn’t right , I knew that I would eventually figure it out . This feeling became even more strong  when I was getting ready for my Quinceanera. While all my friends were dreading their Catholic Mass ( because most of them only attended church for special occasions) I knew I wasn’t going to have one and that I didn’t want one. I remember my close friend K ( her parents were and still are inactive LDS members) saying that she was going to get baptized in the catholic church to have her mass and that didn’t sit right with me , because I wondered why only she was doing it but not her parents or her younger brothers, she asked me to go with her once and I did since we had gone to the movies and her class  was shortly after but I walked out saying ” Yeah , I’m just having the party “.

     It wasn’t until my sophomore year in high school that I met someone who straight up said she was Mormon and I remember we had a discussion on clothing , I didn’t get how she wore stuff that was on trend but over t-shirts she said it was because she wanted to be modest , I think I took it badly because I was allowed to wear what I wanted as long as it was even appropriate and that my parents saw me wear it out of the house , they trusted me to make good clothing choices and I didn’t wear overly revealing clothes so I didn’t see what was wrong with my clothes, I only got in trouble for dress code once and I still think I didn’t deserve that because my skirt reached my finger tips and the cheerleaders wore skirts way shorter , anyways although then I didn’t understand her and thought she was judging me , I do admit that I thought M was proud of what she stood for , for not complaining that she had to wake up super early to go to a religious class before regular school and didn’t care about what people thought about her she stood by her beliefs, but other than that I stayed away from her . 

   Fast forward 4 years to my sophomore year in college , I went to a Lutheran university , why? Well because my friends were going and I realized that going to the out-of-state school I wanted to go to  involved dealing with snow and I wasn’t about that . While going there I was living a worldly life doing what some consider “normal college student life ” . I wasn’t going too crazy but I know I didn’t make a lot of right choices and life taught me a lesson . My mom got really sick  and really fast and the doctors weren’t very optimistic about her condition ,  they had my dad pull me from school so that I could see her one last time , it was hard and I was a mess and so angry at everything , while in the hospital with her two elders (male missionaries ) showed up  and offered to give her a blessing . They walked in through one door and I walked out the other , I couldn’t see why God would allow someone like my mom to end up how she was it wasn’t fair she didn’t deserve it . I went back to school and due to my lack of focus, actions and my inability to cope with the situation I ended up on academic probation and I ended up losing my scholarship for a semester  . That summer has hard my mom went through so many treatments and I saw so much hurt and felt so much hurt and there were some improvements , but every time she took a turn for the worse I acted out again .

By junior year my “relationship” and friendships were a huge mess , I was always upset , school was a struggle , my anxiety levels were crazy,  I went out way too much, made bad decisions and we found out that my mom would never have a normal life , I wasn’t happy in any way and knew I was missing something .  On the last week of school I decided to get a tattoo that would somehow tie my to my family. I needed to feel close to them and I thought that would help , so I went out and had my friend do it  but I did not expect what happened the next day .

I went home for summer having decided to  move into my dads new apartment ; my mom had been transferred to a sub acute clinic in San Fernando, my dad sold the house and moved and since it was only a 30 minute drive to school I could commute for senior year . That first night I went to see my mom and while I was with her my dad stepped out for a few minutes and came back with a card . He said he ran into an acquaintance who had acquired this card from two girls in the park and that she immediately felt that she needed to give it to us. It was a pass along card and my mom immediately told my dad to call it . It was May 16th at 8:45 pm and my mom told me that she wanted me to take the missionary lesson just take them, that she just wanted me to know of the gospel but that she didn’t expect me to get baptized that she just wanted me to know . At 8:50 pm two girls about my age showed up and I had my best stink face on ( believe me they could tell I was far from excited  ) but I grudgingly agreed to take the lessons  saying “only because my mom wants me to.”

A month later on June 16th I was baptized in the San Fernando Spanish YSA in the San Fernando stake and confirmed a member a week later. My parents both attended still shocked at my decision since they found out when Sisters Pulver and Wendell  let it slip a week before . But I remember my dad’s face proud that I made the choice on my own and I remember my mom sitting in a wheelchair with an oxygen tank and I stood amazed that a little over a year before doctors had told us that she would make it past the night , let alone a week and there she was , not whole but happy and alive .

My decision to get baptized surprised me then but looking back I was waiting for that strong push to change my life I was done with the things I was doing with the pain I was always in , I wanted to know I would always have my family even when we weren’t together .  What I learned touched my heart and changed it , I knew it was true , my heart knew knew it too and immense joy followed that knowledge .  I now know that Families are forever, that the church has been restored on the earth , that the Book of Mormon is true and that the words written in it are for this time and dispensation , that in combination with the Bible, Doctrine and Covenants and the Pearl of Great Price that it lays down the plan our Heavenly Father has for us . I know that the covenants I’ve made are right and true and I know I am not perfect , I know I still make mistakes but I know I can repent for them and I know what not to do and that being steadfast in my choices will lead me back to being in the presence of my Heavenly Father. Life since my baptism hasn’t been easy or perfect but my understanding has made it easier and I now know how to trust that  just as life will find a way to bring you  down that it will also provide a way to build you back up and make you stronger and I can definitely see now how blessed I have been and I know I have been so much more happy even through the trials and tribulations .

I now invite you to read , just read my stories , my ramblings of daily life , my friends stories , and the words of those who inspire me in hope that I can share some happiness and  hope in this world no matter what your beliefs may be  , or who you are because at the end of the day we are all the same . And if you feel so inspired to know if what changed my life is true , then I invite you to reach out and find out for yourself .